Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Ka-ka-kawaii appropriation: not a good look, Avril

Avril Lavigne, I feel hella embarrassed for you. I feel sorry for you. You are a year older than me and when I was in high-school I genuinely liked that "he was a skater boy she said see ya later boy" song.

You seemed cool, like a different kind of pop star. You wrote your own songs.

You hijacked my necktie look (seriously, I was wearing neckties in hs and getting made fun of all the time until the "Complicated" video and then every girl was wearing a necktie), but it's aight. I was upset about it at the time because I was just trying to be different, and you made it seem okay for others to do something they wouldn't normally do. That is an admirable thing.


But what is this "Hello Kitty" bullshit? I haven't been following your career lately super hard, but what is this? How does this shit fit into your brand? I can understand the fear of 30, believe me I do, but this is a huge step back. Like, what are you even thinking?

Even if you really just wanted to sing a song about how much you love glitter and crazy outfits and candy, like is this really the best you could do?

Why are you riding the cultural appropriation coattails of Miley Cyrus and Lily Allen? You are so much better than them, and you are so much better than this.

Are you trying to make a splash? Are you trying to be relevant? Why not just be you?


For fuck's sake, fire whoever is managing your image right now. Like, even without all the ka-ka-kawaii korniness, it's a badly produced video. It looks cheap. It looks like you're trying way too hard. It looks like you don't even know what you're doing, like someone is pulling your puppet strings. God, even N'Sync was able to move past that.

I wanna believe someone is telling you to go this route with the edgy 3 years ago haircut and singing about "silly kitties" and slumber parties.

I wanna believe that you are just receiving bad advice.

I really wanna believe that there is some special backstory that explains why you did this, Avril, because all I can really see from here is desperation, and it's really not a good look.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

fun with closed captioning!


You can click this link and watch it, or just read these hilariously poorly translated closed captions. Michael O'Hara, word up-- thanks for pointing out the captions to me.

It's a new poem now!











Thursday, April 10, 2014

today I am Pianofight's featured poet for National Poetry Month

I was asked by Pianofight, a theater group in San Francisco, to perform some poetry in front of some video cameras in honor of National Poetry Month. They asked a bunch of other local poets the same, like my friend Jason Schenheit (who I bumped into on the street after he had finishing filming and I was walking over).

Ham that I am, of course I said yes. I walked over to their new Tenderloin location and had a hard time finding it, a lady on the corner who was on the periphery of an altercation assisted me, showing me the hidden in plain sight gated entryway.

The space is still being worked on, but it is extremely impressive. I look forward to attending shows and parties there. The Pianofight folks were all super nice, too, and we had fun filming the poems.

Today, I am the featured poet on the Pianofight site. Here's what they had to say:

Stoked to have Alexandra Naughton as our featured poet today. When she isn’t writing & performing her unique brand of Daria-esque infused poetry, Alexandra busies herself as her hip-hop alter-ego, The Tsaritsa, & can be found dropping phat rhymes on Soundcloud or promoting her book, I Will Always Be Your Whore: Love Songs for Billy Corgana tribute to the elusive & ever-poetic Smashing Pumpkins frontman. She hopes Billy reads the book someday.

Thursday, April 03, 2014

DIPTIX, my new ebook, published by Peanut Gallery Press

Patrick Trotti approached me a few weeks ago about putting an ebook out with his new e-publishing house, Peanut Gallery Press.

Of course I said yes, and I felt like I had just the right thing up my sleeve with this collection of poetic diptychs. 

Please enjoy DIPTIX !