Holy publicity, Batman!!

Here I am wearing the ЯGen™ V1 silver armor shirt (it's antibacterial, odor resistant, and protects against radiation) standing next to our lovely mannequin who is wearing the SOMA-1 Wearcom™.

MacWorld 2011 was a great success. We met a lot of people, got a lot of feedback, answered a lot of questions, and took down a lot of ideas that people gave us. I was really impressed by how many people positively responded to the products and by how many blogs picked up our story. If you type "alphyn industries" into google you'll see a long list of articles written about our company.

Last week, if you google searched us all you would have seen was a link to a post on this blog, the Alphyn website, and the Alphyn twitter page. MacWorld was wonderful exposure, and now we can only cross our fingers that our popularity increases exponentially. The only bad thing that happened over the three days that we were at the expo was when we noticed that someone had taken the Giants cap off of our mannequin (who does that?? ugh). I have so many press release kits to send out tomorrow. It's getting serious now and I'm excited!


Check out this video of Ben being interviewed at MacWorld





And here are just a few articles written about Alphyn Industries:

gotta be mobile: "Alphyn jacket lets you use your iPad on the go"

thenormanomicon: "Alphyn Industries"

engadget: "Alphyn Industries jackets play iPad close to the chest, stick smartphones on your wrist"


What do YOU think of our products? I would love to get your opinion!

MacWorld 2011, so far...

so good! We had a very successful first day at MacWorld and we made quite a few sales. I'm so happy that Alphyn Industries is really taking off. Here are some photos of our experience so far. I hope you are all having a wonderful week, and I apologize about not being able to read your blogs this week. It's been really crazy around these parts-- we've pretty much just been "Go go go!!" without much time to rest-- but I'll be back next week. I'll write a real post then. As I write this I am half dressed, no makeup on, hair tied back wildly, and I'm not quite ready to leave for the convention yet. I should probably continue getting ready! Have a great weekend!!


Ben in the booth, as we were setting up. Before MacWorld opened to the public.



What a rack! of clothes, duh...



Ben schmoozing with the customers.



Posing with a real dummy.

<3

Mac World and Red Hot Riding Hood

Mac World is this week and Ben and I have been going crazy just trying to get all of our materials in order. You probably will not see too much of me this week, as I'll be busy working the booth. I'm actually pretty excited to go to Mac World and flirt with all the nerds so they buy our products. I'm the eye candy, and I guess I'm okay with being objectified if it means Alphyn Industries makes money.

It's possible that I'll have time to check in on your blogs and leave comments, but if you notice a blackhole in the Twittersphere due to my lack of participation then I genuinely apologize. But I'll be back, no worries. Mac World is only this week.

Because I don't have the time or energy to write a full blog post, let me just relate an anecdote to you. Below is a photograph of a print that Ben and I picked up on one of our trips to wine country.



It's a wolf and a redhead taking a ride on a motorcycle through Sonoma, by an artist and very nice lady named Judy Theo. We chatted a bit with Judy when we stopped in her gallery to look around-- it was actually the orange tree and the statues made of metal scraps outside in the yard in front of her gallery that drew us in. She told us about her spirit animal, the wolf, which is featured in many of her paintings and I asked her is she had seen the Tex Avery cartoon, Red Hot Riding Hood. She hadn't, but she wrote it down. The cartoon is from the 1940s, but it's still friggin hilarious. Tex Avery was always known for being a little out there, not afraid to push the envelope. Please enjoy!

Busy, and puking on Sarah Palin

As I mentioned in my last post, things have been pretty busy around these parts. Last week we were in Vegas at the annual Shot Show, flitting from business meeting to business meeting, and this week we are preparing for the Mac World convention at the Moscone Center where we have a booth for Alphyn Industries.

Ben and I went to his office yesterday and I spent seven hours tagging, folding, and bagging the PADX-1 LEDGE Wearcom™ pullover for the event.

My legs and ass kind of hurt from standing and working for that long, bringing me back to my Whole Paycheck days when I would stand and bag groceries for snotty, privileged Philadelphians.

Tedious and mindless, but at least yesterday I could listen and groove to the hip-hop station as I worked. And sneak up and pinch Ben on the bottom whenever I got bored. Which was pretty much every hour. But I got all the smalls and mediums tagged and bagged, and tomorrow I will prepare the large and extra large pullovers for the show.

I'm excited for Mac World and hopefully it goes off without a hitch and we're able to sell a lot of jackets. That would be awesome. Ben's been working so hard on getting this company off the ground, and I really hope it works out.

I think it's a great product that a lot of people could really use. Let's keep our fingers crossed! Ben named me the "Media Director" of Alphyn Industries, due to my social media networking savvy, so I've been occupied with getting the word out about Alphyn, commenting on technology blogs, and organizing an event after the conclusion of Mac World.

I'm happy to help because I want the company to succeed. I also really enjoy my position, media marketing and networking is my jawn. I've also been busy trying to finish up the prizes from my Pay It Forward meme. I'm nearly done with these two lovely collages, the recipients of which are yet to be determined. So hurry and pray that one of my cut-and-paste creations is coming to you!!


The magazines I used for inspiration were rather... lacking. Maxim is a terrible magazine to make collages from, unless you're doing a titty-shot collage.


This is a video that someone posted in the comments section of an article on Gawker. Totally weird and totally gross, but kind of hilarious as well. Why would someone choose to post this video on youtube is unbeknownst to me, but I am thankful they did.

This is how I feel every time I think of Sarah Palin...

Someone thinks I'm stylish! *blushes*

So, I received a Stylish Blogger Award from two blogs! Yup, that's right. I said two, betches! Christina in Wonderland and the Jet Setting Divas were lovely enough to pass this fashionable award on to moi.



Thank you, my dears! It's been a crazy couple of weeks. Here's why.

Ben and I went to Las Vegas in the middle of the week to attend the annual Shot Show at the Sands and spent the two days that we were there bustling about from meeting to meeting. We went so that we could meet up with a bunch of his contacts in the textile industry to discuss our plans for the future of Alphyn Industries.


The Tsaritsa does not condone violence, but couldn't resist posing with this Smith & Wesson. I do want to learn how to shoot, just for the sake of it, but I still stand by my point that buying a gun should require an extensive background check. Every time.

It was a pretty interesting crowd at the Show, lots of men, lots of beer guts, it smelled like farts in some of the ballrooms (all those high-protein diets), and as a first-timer I was completely engrossed in taking it all in. I didn't have time to go online or anything, and when we got back home our internet was down so I had to call Comcast and sort it out, which they did superbly. Our wireless router from Cisco also wasn't working so Comcast connected me over to Cisco Linksys, and boy did I want to smack the crap out of the smarmy moron on the other line. We just bought the router a few months ago and have been having some issues with it. This is not the first time our internet's gone down since we bought it, and it actually seems to be happening quite frequently, which I explained to the Cisco customer service representative.

I gave her the serial number on the device and after a few minutes (she kept saying "please wait a few moments" which drives me crazy because a moment isn't something you can measure in time, but whatever) she told me that she could not help me. She told me that my ninety days of free customer service had elapsed and that I would have to figure it out. "Bullshit. This is utter bullshit," I said to her, but it was no use. Ben decided this morning to fiddle around with the router and got it up and running after calling his friend, a computer technician. Seriously, fuck Cisco. Customer service is not a luxury, it's a standard that consumers expect. To not offer it after a certain amount of time is a terrible business practice.

Anyway, enough of my excuses, here is the challenge! The rules are that I have to share seven things about myself. I think instead of just listing seven random things about myself, I'll give you a more cohesive list of things that are going on in my life right now, as I type this entry. Current, yes. Captivating, probably not.

1) I'm busy working on two collages that will be mailed as prizes to the winners in my Pay It Forward post. I'm really excited about making them perfect and worthy of your bloggyness!

2) Every day is a challenge to create a new look with the clothes that exist in my closet. It's fun, though. I'm super broke, so buying new items is not an option, unless of course I find a great deal at the thrift store. It's the time to scrimp and save these days, but I still strive to be stylish.

3) I try to find beauty in everyday objects.



4) I just found out that my unemployment claim has run out, and now I have to apply for emergency unemployment compensation. And billionaires and millionaires across America got a tax cut. Sometimes I can't believe our president is a Democrat.

5) The next issue of Be About It, my zine, is coming out soon and I am still accepting submissions! The theme is "dreams" so please send me your writing and artwork!! I'd love to include it!

6) I'm hoping someone decides to buy this cute belt I listed in the Swap section of Chictopia. Knock on wood.

7) I'm taking more time to breathe, smile, and relax. I feel so much happier.


What seven things are going on in your life right now? I will open this award up to anyone who wishes to accept it. I love all of my readers, anyway, you are all lovely and stylish! Grab the button up at the top, put it on your blog, and tell me what's happening in your neck of the woods!! <3

How I found love

You may remember back in November when I asked you all to vote and tell me which topic you thought I should blog about. There were a bunch of different choices, varying from hearing about my brush with music video fame to listening to me rant about why the prison system in the United States is a big joke.

Since I did promise that I would eventually write about all these topics, and you already got to hear the winning story, I will go down the list and blog about all these topics, one by one.


1) The time I met Jason Schwartzman and was featured in a Phantom Planet music video (at age 16).


2) How I met Ben, the love of my life.


3) The story of how I spent a night sleeping outside of an airport in Italy.


4) Why Jesse "the Body" Ventura would make an excellent president.


5) On being an outcast.


6) My thoughts on the prison system in the United States.


I'll start with the second topic, the story of how I met my boyfriend, Ben, the love of my life. It all began with a mini vacation to San Francisco to go visit a friend I hadn't seen in a while. I also had never been to California at that point, and I was really excited to take a few days off from work and just relax.

It was September of 2008 and I remember the day I flew out there because it was the 11th and I was afraid to fly that day-- I didn't realize when I purchased my tickets that I had chosen to fly on 9/11. My parents told me it was the safest day to fly, anyway, and I guess that made me feel better because I didn't worry about it at all when I flew out. Arriving in sunny, beautiful San Francisco was such a lovely change of pace from the hot and sticky Philadelphia I had just left. I had my hopes up for a good time.

After a few days of exploring the city, walking through just about every neighborhood, and taking plenty of photographs, my vacation was coming to an end and I wanted to go out with a bang.

Some wacky chick that my friend (now ex-friend, she did some pretty horrible things to me that I will not mention in this post, but for now let's just call her "the roach") knew talked about a big warehouse party that was happening later that night, my last night in town.

I was down for some fun, so we pre-gamed a little bit at a bar in the Mission and eventually meandered our way to the SOMA warehouse (I'm pretty sure we walked the entire way there, late at night, and bumped into a few crazy characters, talking to themselves, roaming the abandoned city streets).

We walked into the place and I wanted to leave immediately. It was super dark, there was really loud trance music being played over the speakers, and I just felt like an odd duck. The roach and I sat down on a couch in the corner of the dark room while her boyfriend at the time went around the warehouse to find the chick who invited us.

He returned from behind a curtain and told us to come into another room where there was lighting, a bar, and more seating. This room wasn't as loud, and there were people in there just lounging around and talking. We sat down on another couch and chatted a while with Maya, the wacky girl who invited us to the gathering.

At some point I felt eyes on me. I looked around and saw a tall, handsome guy with dark hair and dark eyes, wearing a yellow t-shirt and looking at me. I looked back at him and smiled. He was really good looking, and I felt so flattered because this type of "making eyes" at someone who I thought was attractive never happened to me before.

Sure, I've had dudes make eyes at me, but it was always the dudes you wouldn't go touch with a ten foot pole. This guy was hot and he was checking me out, and I was reciprocating. He eventually came over to where I was sitting and struck up a conversation with me. We chatted for a while until we were interrupted by the roach, who had drunk too much and needed to step outside for some air. I went with her and asked Ben, the hot guy in the yellow shirt, to save my place on the couch.

After the roach caught her breath, I went back inside and found that the guy had taken over the couch with his guy friends. I went right over to him and wagged my finger and he laughed and scooched over so I could sit.

We sat next to each other for the rest of the night, talking and laughing and eventually holding hands. I remember we talked about unions in America and why I thought they are necessary, and we discussed an assortment of other important topics that I cannot remember right now. We spent a good amount of time on that couch just talking and looking at each other.

A few times he suggested that we leave and go back to his place, but I refused. I didn't want him to think I was easy because we had just met, and at the time I wasn't looking to get involved with anyone. But he was persistent.

The kooky chick who invited us to the party told me that Ben was a good guy and that I could trust him. She reassured me this and told me that they used to date years ago. I took her word for it and told the roach (who was in a sour mood) that I was going to leave with Ben and that she should just go home with her boyfriend and that I would collect my things in the morning.

I really just wanted to continue talking with Ben and learning more about him, and I didn't feel like sleeping on a nasty futon with the roach for another night. Besides, I had no feelings of guilt doing this, as the roach had left me by myself at numerous parties whenever she felt like hooking up with someone. [She even disappeared at a party at my house the night before she was supposed to attend her cousin's funeral. Her mom called me the next morning, barking at me, wanting to know where her little roach was. I had no idea because she didn't even tell me she was leaving. What a jerk.]

Anyway, I didn't feel bad telling her my plan, but then she asked if she could come with, for some reason. I tried reasoning with her that she should just go home with her boyfriend, but she didn't want to. So weird. So the three of us walked out of the crazy trance warehouse party (and I left a shopping bag with a brand new dress I bought in Chinatown, which was gone when we tried to locate it the next day) and went to Ben's car.

When we got to his apartment, Ben told the roach that she could crash on the couch in the living room while we cuddled and chatted in the bedroom. We could hear her fussing about and complaining about the sun rising, as it was early morning at this point, and the whining got so bad that Ben, gentleman that he is, drove her back to her house so she could complain all she wanted about the sun in her eyes without annoying us.

Ben came back and we continued our cuddle session in peace. Ben decided that I should stay an extra day, and I couldn't disagree, so I canceled my return ticket and bought a new ticket for the next day. We spent the entire time in bed, just kissing and hugging and talking. Ben even made me breakfast in bed. It really was wonderful and completely unexpected. When it came time to leave for the airport, I was sad and didn't want to go home, but Ben told me he would be coming to the East coast in the next few weeks and that we would see each other soon.

I didn't want to fall in love, I didn't try to fall in love, I wasn't looking to fall in love, but it happened to me anyway.

Later on, we met up in New York City and had a romantic weekend together and I decided that I didn't want to live all the way across the country from one another and that I needed to move to San Francisco so we could be together. Ben agreed and we made plans to ship my stuff out and move my life to California. I gave my boss at my high-paying insurance job two weeks notice and started saying my goodbyes to everyone.

The hardest part was breaking the news to my family, who were pretty shocked at my sudden life-changing decision, but I knew in my heart that I was making the right choice. Now, two and a half years later, I say that I definitely did the right thing by following my heart. I don't regret it at all.




Have you ever followed your heart and made a crazy life-changing move? How did it work out? Have you ever done something that everyone said you would regret? Was it worth it?

Style Update: fine threads, from punk to maxi glam

You know I love to dress up, right? For a while I had the famous and highly contagious plague and I wasn't able to leave the bed, let alone get dressed up to leave the house, so there has been a mild dearth of style posts on this blog lately. Well, have no fear for I have returned wearing my most chic super hero cape. Okay, so it's not a cape (though I kinda wish I had one, they're in vogue right now), but it's a jacket, and a warm one at that! On to the clothes!!

Ripped Jeans


I took these photos myself using a timer and a tripod. They aren't the greatest photos, but it gives you a good idea of my outfit. The jeans I've had for several years now and have taken it upon themselves to fall apart at the knees. I decided to make the jeans even more grunge by dragging a pair of scissors over the thighs of the pants. The sneakers belong to my little sister, but I have no intention of returning them!




Turquoise Necklace


Here are some more photos of me posing in my living room. In this look, I took a summery dress and made it winter-appropriate. All I needed was a pair of warm leggings and my trusty green cardigan.




Heal Haiti


This maxi skirt came from the "swap" section on Chictopia-- I didn't have to pay a dime for it!-- and I was really excited about styling it for the first time. Ben told me that I looked like an orthodox Jewish girl with my extra long skirt, which made me feel a little self-conscious, so I paired the skirt with a graphic tee so it would be obvious to observers that I wasn't part of a super strict religious sect. Not that any of that matters, but Ben wore a Stetson hat that day and it did look a little like we were brother and sister coming back from synagogue.




Smile, Damn It!


This mask was a Christmas gift from my Aunt Brenda. I use it when I don't feel like smiling. Just kidding. I got these little lace shorts on sale at a stocking shop to wear under skirts (in case a breeze whisks by I don't end up flashing anyone my panties), but I couldn't resist putting them on for a mini photo shoot. Sookie kept walking into frame and getting her butt photographed. I love her!




So Punk


This look was inspired and built around my Blondie tank top, which I love a lot but haven't worn in a few years. I paired it with a cranberry-colored mini skirt, a pair of white tights, and a pair of black over-the-knee socks for a sexy effect. I also got to wear my guitar pick necklace, which was made for me by my friend Cyn back when we were in college.




What do you think of my looks? I can't tell you how happy I was when I finally had enough strength to get out of bed and get dressed! I know a lot of people love lazing about in their pajamas, but I really do enjoy getting dressed. I also like getting undressed after a long day, but let's not go there right now...

You know you wanna #FF this azz!

#FF on Twitter stands for Follow Friday, a hashtag (or label) that we use only on Fridays to let our followers know who is cool and who deserves to be followed because they are just that interesting. I do not do Follow Friday every week because it feels a little like pandering to me, but every once in a while I will break out the double F and tell my tweeps what's up.

I posted two #FollowFriday tweets this morning:



My rule for Follow Friday is that I only pick Twitterers who give me the time of day. You know, the people who respond to my queries and mentions and who don't act completely full of themselves. It bugs me to no end when I attempt to form a line of communication with another Tweeter only to be ignored. Bitch, please. If I can get a response from a Gold-selling rap artist, then I definitely expect a response from your 44-follower-having-ass when I ask you a question. Is that too harsh? Sorry, it annoys me when people act like celebrities when they clearly are in the same boat as all of us. Rest assured that I'm not talking about any of you lovely people.

How do you feel about Twittiquette (Twitter etiquette) and promotional hashtags like #FF? I'm curious! Would you #FF this azz??

Pay it forward (because you will get presents!!)

I love Kevin Spacey. Cover of Pay it Forward.

My blogger friend Lauren, of Lauren vs. Reality posted something on her blog yesterday that I thought was really cool. It's a giveaway of sorts called "Pay it Forward" and the object is share cool handmade things with your readers. Here are the official rules:


Pay it Forward 2011: I promise to send something handmade to the first 5 people who leave a comment. They must in turn post this and send something they made to the first 5 people who comment. The rules are that it must be handmade by you and it must be sent to your 5 people sometime in 2011. (What a great way to start 2011!!)


Sounds pretty awesome, right? And it's not a crazy giveaway where 400 people enter and only one person has a chance of winning. There will be five winners! And all you have to do is follow me and leave a comment! So easy!! If you are one of the first five to comment, you will get one of the following:


-- a drawing of Anderson Cooper and Kathy Griffin




-- a collage comprised of images cut out of fashion catalogs, with drawings by me on top

-- a postcard with a message on it, written in the style of a delusional neurotic

-- a drawing of a man in a tutu dancing on a stripper pole

-- a series of haiku


Aren't my prizes super enticing?? All of these things will be made by yours truly. Follow, leave a comment and Pay it Forward!! Oh, and don't forget to tell alllll your friends about the wonderfulness that is the Tsaritsa sez!!

Style Notes 1/12/2010

Should I not write political blogs? I want to keep you all entertained, but I also want to be true to myself and be able to rant every once in a while when I feel the urge. Is that okay with you? Or maybe you're just not interested in politics at all. I'm curious to hear your thoughts.



In style news, I just listed a new item on the Chictopia Swap and I thought I would share it with you. The item is a red leather belt with brass clasps in the shape of trees. It's very cute and adds a bit of drama to any outfit.



The last time I listed an item it seemed like it took forever before anyone swooped up and redeemed it, so I'm hoping this belt will be more popular. Someone did eventually shell out for the sweater that I listed last month, and she even featured it on her blog. How special!


I'm really glad she liked the sweater! She surely get more wear out of it than I ever did. I only wore it once or twice, and only to have my photo taken in it. Ha!


Oh yeah, there I am! I would circle my name in red pen if I could!

Something pretty cool happened today-- one of my glamour shots that I posted on Tumblr was reblogged by a fashion lover. I know there are a lot of people who get their posts on Tumblr reblogged a billion times and one little reblog doesn't really mean anything, but it made me feel good regardless.

Democrats Taking Back Patriotism (let's keep it real)

Image via Wikipedia

Bill Maher was on Jay Leno last night and boy have I missed his voice of reason over the winter break.

You may not agree with him, and I don't always agree with what he says, but I appreciate Maher's opinion and sense of humor and he quite often says exactly what I am thinking-- albeit a lot more eloquently.

Leno asked Maher for his take on the recent tragedy in Arizona, where 18 people were shot, six killed, and an assassination attempt was made on Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords, now in critical condition due to a gun shot wound to the head.

Maher's response was something I've been saying since this happened: something needs to be done about the way we embrace guns in this country. There is no reason anyone needs a clip that shoots so many rounds, as they're solely designed to kill lots and lots of people. That's all they're good for, and not too long ago it was illegal to sell or buy these "extended clips." They shouldn't be legal now. In fact, all of these assault weapons should be illegal.




Watch this video!

Another point that Bill Maher made was about how Democrats, and all Liberals, should make it their duty to reclaim patriotism. "Paying taxes is patriotic, making sure that every American has Health Care is patriotic..." and he's right.

What's not patriotic is wanting to pay no taxes but then having the audacity to complain about potholes on your roads and the length of time it takes the police to show up at your house. That's not patriotic. If you care about your country, you should pay your fair share. Hell, I don't mind paying my fair share and I don't even have a job, but I realize how important taxes are and all of the good social services they pay for.

I'm going to go off on a tangent, but this reminds me of an argument I got into with some person who said this oxymoron: "I'm socially liberal but I'm fiscally conservative." Sorry, but that doesn't make sense.

If you support helping the public and ensuring that all kids in public schools get a decent education and that police officers make a good salary and poor families get a good meal every day, well you gotta pay for it somehow, right? How do you pay for all of those things? With taxes. Duh.

Conservatives and rich people who don't want to pay taxes usually couldn't give a damn about the kids in public school or crime in the inner cities because it doesn't affect them the way it affects most constituents (it affects us more because we don't have private compounds to hide out in).

My point in this tangent is just, keep it real. If you're a conservative who doesn't think people should pay taxes, don't pretend that you care about serving the public because you don't. And don't give me some lame argument about government waste, because no one is for government waste. And some of the biggest wasters are conservatives, so please. Really.

And you see what I did there? I just listed out all of my thoughts and opinions and though I disagreed with this person, I didn't resort to alluding to shooting them nor did I put a target over their head, or anything like that. Wouldn't it be nice if we could all sit around and argue without breaking out this language of violence?

There has been a lot of talk about it recently in the wake of the Tucson, Arizona shooting, but is anyone going to do anything about it? I will not link the language to the tragedy, because there is no solid proof connecting the two, but just for the sake of it, don't you think people should tone it down?

They probably won't, but they should. There's no reason to resort to violence, even if it's just "rhetorical."

Press Release! Alphyn Industries!

Check out the press release I wrote for my boyfriend's new company, Alphyn Industries. He just launched the website today, and items are now available for sale. Let me know what you think!

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:

San Francisco, California U.S.A. - January 2011

INTRODUCING ALPHYN INDUSTRIES CUTTING EDGE TECHNOLOGICAL APPAREL
Imagine always having your gadgets at hand whenever you need them, accessible only to you. Alphyn Industries presents the next generation of interaction with Wearcom™ garments. Seamlessly interfacing with the latest and greatest communication devices, our garments proudly stand by the information revolution. Alphyn Industries is a brand new company dedicated to bringing you cutting edge apparel technologies straight from the military industrial complex and secret aerospace labs. Our products are the result of years of defense industry research and superior garment architecture. Through our new products, everything that you need to make the future a better reality is within reach.



The SOMA-1 Wearcom™ pullover is the most advanced garment on the market today. Dedicating a custom pocket for your smart phone on your left forearm, it is made of advanced waterproof thermal softshell with the perfect balance of strength, stretch and softness-- and it allows you to stay connected while out and about in public. The SOMA-1 is the first garment of its kind to allow for easy, single handed control of your smartphone. Designed to fit a variety of smartphone devices including: iPhone G3 and G4, iPod Touch, and other similar devices (2.5 x 5 Inch). Wearcom™ pullovers for iPhone and iPad makes it easy for you to apply the smart devices effortlessly into your professional and social activities.
The garment’s architecture and the forearm support straps prevent the device from shifting around and helps distribute the smartphone’s weight across the entire left arm and shoulder. The patented SOMA pocket is designed to hold your touch screen phone and enables you to control it through a thin but rugged and ultra transparent film-- clear enough even for your most important video calls. The padded protective cover can be kept in place in the open or closed positions. The protective cover can also be used to shade the device screen from bright lights or preying eyes. The SOMA-1 pullover has our Advanced Kangaroo Pockets with a zippered pocket on either side for your hands and a small middle zippered pocket.



The PADX-1 LEDGE Wearcom™ is your iPad’s new best friend. With the PADX-1 LEDGE you can now comfortably use your iPad anywhere, with both hands freely available to interact with the device or with your environment. The patented LEDGE pocket securely holds your iPad on your chest on a protective, supported platform. It is designed to allow for easy access to a smartpad device when needed, and then for the user to quickly put the device away by simply zipping up the LEDGE pocket. The PADX-1 LEDGE Wearcom™ is designed specifically for the iPad. With the growing popularity of smartpad devices, we will soon also accommodate other devices such as the Samsung GALAXY, Toshiba Smartpad and the ViewSonic ViewPad.
The PADX-1 LEDGE Wearcom™ pullover is made of advanced waterproof, thermal softshell, with the perfect balance of strength, stretch and softness. A load-bearing harness system at the chest and shoulders supports the smartpad device and distributes the weight on the upper body to reduce fatigue. The patented LEDGE pocket is designed to hold the smartpad against the chest and allow for easy device viewing and control. The LEDGE pocket flap attaches snugly to the smartpad device to prevent it from shifting around. The pocket flap also protects the device from light impacts. The PADX-1 LEDGE pullover has our Advanced Kangaroo Pockets with a zippered pocket on either side for your hands and a small middle zippered pocket.



The ЯGen™ V1 Long Sleeve Shirt is extremely soft and comfortable. Its V neck collar, full length sleeves and light gray color makes it a stylish and easy-to-wear shirt. The ЯGen™ V1 features ЯGen™ Silver Armor technology designed to protect the wearer from invisible environmental threats like dangerous bacteria and EMI radiation, making it one of the most advanced garments on the market today.
ЯGen™ Silver Armor shirts are made with specially designed cotton fabric with silver particles that reduce odor-causing bacteria. Test results prove these garments are effective in inhibiting the bacteria (Lactobacillus brevis) that grow in sweat and form the odorous metabolites. By inhibiting bacterial growth, the ЯGen™ shirt also aids in the healing of cuts and wounds. To protect the wearer from harmful EMI radiation, the ЯGen™ shirt uses the Farady cage principle to deflect electromagnetic fields away from the wearer. ЯGen™ Silver Armor shielding has been shown in testing to provide modification to at least 99% in the frequency range of 800 MHz to 18 GHz. The ЯGen™ textiles have been tested for more than 100 washes without reduction in shielding effects.

All of our products are sold through our online store at www.alphynind.com.


Alphyn Industries is a San Francisco-based company founded in 2010 by Ben Raviv.

The Expletive Attributives Karaoke Vlogring (the F*ck one)

Greetings and salutations!! Welcome to the third installment of our KARAOKE VLOG RING!!! Today we have some real treats for you, as this month's theme for our karaoke vlogs is the "F" word, and no the "f" doesn't stand for flatulence (though that could be a really great idea for next month's theme). This month we all had to create a video of ourselves singing along to a song that has the word "fuck" in it somewhere.


photo source

Awesome, right? It's good for me because about three-quarters of my music library is laced with expletives, so I definitely had a lot of choices when it came down to picking a song. I think I chose a really good one, though it'll probably surprise you that it is NOT a hip-hop tune. That's all I will say. Oh, and there are orbs in the original video (the quality degraded when I transferred it to Youtube). Some go into my body and there is one that my cat stares at then chases. Pretty creepy. To watch it you'll have to go to Sara Swears A Lot, the blog of Sara, our Worthy Karaoke Leader who really cracks the whip. In a kinky way. Rawr.

Here's my video...

Internet-fluenza

Don't I look pleasant?




Blargh! It seems like all the bloggers I know through these here internets (as well as my boyfriend and 50% of my family) has come down with a nasty case of something. I am not exempt. What this sickness is hasn't been determined It felt like a cold at first, and then I was sure I had meningitis from all the muscle aches and pains I was feeling, then came the nausea, and now I cannot stand up for too long or else I get a dizzy spell. It friggin sucks. I can't even leave the house to pick up a new box of tissues for fear of collapsing in the supermarket. It's pathetic, I know. To top it all off, I have to clean the apartment and have it presentable for Ben's father and brother this evening, who are visiting from South Africa and are leaving tomorrow. Ben wants them to stop by and meet our kitty, which is completely understandable if you've ever met our Sookie. She's the cutest.




So, I guess I'll have to suck it up, take my Mucinex and my Tylenol, stay hydrated, and eat some food that won't liquify my insides. I hope that I find some strength today to do chores, in addition to all the other work I've been putting off since Tuesday. I did manage to put Ben's Facebook Fan page together for the company he is launching, Alphyn Industries. I really hate being sick. It's one thing to choose to stay inside and watch smelly-vision all day, and it's a whole other situation when that is all you are physically able to do. You should pity me right now.

Are you sick too? If so, what have your symptoms been like? Do you think we'll eventually get better?

Holiday Fashions

Here is a look of some of the fashions I wore over this holiday season. I didn't really dress up on New Years Eve because we didn't go out, but anytime we even left the house I made sure I was wearing something snappy. Please enjoy!


My cousin's dalmatian, Cooper. He's such a sweetheart.


My mom got me the sweater and top for Christmas, and I wore them both on Christmas day when we all went crazy in celebrating. I actually wore the cardigan every day during my visit back to Philly. It was cold there!



The day I left, an outfit for air travel. Isn't my mom gorgeous? The t-shirt is fun-- it's an homage to the LOVE statue by Robert Indiana in JFK Plaza in Philly, and for those of you who don't know "jawn" is a Philly slang word which can be used to replace any noun. As in, "Pass me that remote jawn over there," or "Don't eat all the jawns in that bowl!!"





I wore this number out to brunch with Ben before we both left to visit our families.







Wearing bright colors on a gloomy day and showing off the bag that my aunt got for me for Christmas. How did she know I didn't have a proper handbag?

Compensating for something, Mr. Boehner?

Source: New York Times

As if it isn't bad enough that the dude's name looks like it should be pronounced "BONER," Nancy Pelosi made a really funny joke today when handing her Majority Speaker post over. As she presented Mr. Boehner with a very large gavel, she remarked "[it] is larger than most gavels here, but the gavel of choice for Mr. Speaker Boehner." hahaha

Sorry, I have been practically bedbound for the past two days and felt like I should post something. I'll be back with regularly scheduled posts most likely tomorrow. Damn air travel! It almost never fails to make me sick, which brings me to this: If you are sick, do not travel on a plane. Be courteous. At least wear a mask!

The "F" word...

Some of you may know about the vlog ring I participate in monthly, but for those of you who don't: I'm an attention-whore and I like to make videos of myself to post on teh internetz. Every month I join in with my fellow attention-whores and we all make videos of ourselves singing and dancing along to a song that goes with the theme of the month. Last month the theme was show-tunes. This month it's the word "fuck."

I like cursing, but I also know when it's inappropriate and how to hold it back. My mom hates hearing curse words, especially out of the mouth of her oldest child (me). If we're watching a movie and someone says "Fuck!" the next thing I'll hear is a gasp escaping her lips, as if she can't believe that someone in an R-rated movie just swore-- out loud! Suffice it to say that cursing has been something I've kept on the down-low in my life, for fear of disappointing my mother. Zealot that she is, my mom would even chastise the kids on the playground if she heard them using foul language. You can imagine how embarrassing it was for nine-year-old me!

Despite my rocky history with curse words, I enjoy employing them. I try not to put them into practice too often on this blog because I feel like swearing gives people the wrong impression (I don't want my readers thinking I'm some idiot and that "shit" and "fuck" are the only words I know), besides my mom reads my blog and I am not trying to intentionally piss her off. Anyway, I was really excited about this month's theme for karaoke vlogging and so I made a bonus video in addition to my longer piece (to be featured on someone else's blog next week) which I would like to share with you.

A disclaimer first: I really like Eminem. I think he is clever, extremely talented, and usually very funny. I understand that a lot of people do not get his humor and therefore think he is a bigot. I once performed this song at a karaoke club and though I wasn't booed off stage, I might as well have been. Several people left during my performance and the karaoke jockey couldn't wait to get me off the microphone. I don't get it, though. I am a woman and also a feminist. I am not a misogynist and I don't believe Mr. Marshall Mathers is, either. He just has a sick sense of humor, which I greatly appreciate. I can't stop chuckling at times when I recite his lyrics, he's too damn funny.

What do you think of this song?

Resolutions, drawing, and ghost hunting

HAPPY NEW YEAR!! I hope you all had a lovely celebration and that you're not hurting too bad this morning. Last night was a very low-key evening, which was great because that was exactly what I wanted.

My friend Evelynne came over and we set up our own VIP section in my living room. We ate some delicious homemade bean soup (because everyone knows you eat bean soup at a New Year's Eve party, duh...), sipped on mimosas made with Prosecco, made a lot of videos of us just sitting around and chatting, drew some funny pictures, and basically just chilllllled.


Mmmmimosa!


I'm kinda over going out to clubs and getting drizzy all the damn time, and I have found that I'm usually severely disappointed by the crowd who goes out on NYE. I often get stepped all over or wind up with a drink accidentally thrown in my direction, and that is never any fun-- people be crazy! I'm really glad that Evy wanted to stay in, too. It was her idea, actually, and I happily played along. I love having friends who are fine with just sitting around the apartment and being goofy.

Here are some more photos and videos from our little party:


Cheddar, beans, and chips! BALLIN!!!



My interpretation of Kathy Griffin and Anderson Cooper the Silver Fox. I know, it's not the best depiction of them, but use your imagination. Also, I was drawing from memory.



We decided to hunt for ghosts in my apartment. I showed Evy a video I made last week where you can see a bunch of orbs come into frame and disappear. Sookie even chases one for a while. The idea was to perform a ritual to see if any ghosts would show themselves.



Evy drew a portrait of me.



Our Resolutions for the New Year! Also, some very loud noises.


How was your evening? Did you make any resolutions?

Goodbye 2010, Hello 2011

Image via Wikipedia

2010 was a relatively good year. All right, scratch that. A lot of really crappy things happened around the world, like the British Petroleum Oil spill disaster in the Gulf and the earthquake in Haiti, two big events that we're still dealing with and trying to fix (though you wouldn't know it just by watching the news, which has pretty much abandoned both stories). The economy didn't seem to get any better, the Democrats lost control of the House, and troops are still in Afghanistan and dying everyday. None of these are good things.

Also, a lot of crazy things happened in my life, but I managed to stay mostly sane and find some positivity despite the calamitous atmosphere. I was downsized from my job, went on funemployment, searched fruitlessly for an internship, but then I decided to sell my skills on Craigslist, got an internship writing web content for a small local company, and started helping my boyfriend a bit with his new business. I also started taking this blog seriously. Blogging has not only been been great writing practice I've gotten to know a lot of wonderful people. Expanding my network of writing friends has also enabled me to start Be About It, my zine-- something I had always wanted to do but never thought possible before. So far I have published two issues to an ever expanding audience, and have a third issue in the works. I'm now looking into publishing the zine online so even more people can read it.

I'm looking forward to saying goodbye to 2010 and welcoming in 2011. Hopefully we will all do better next year. My wish for everyone is that we all find our own bits of positivity, even if everything else seems like it's going to shambles, and keep that hope alive. Things have GOT to get better! They can only get better, right? Let's hope so. My dad sent me a really wonderful e-mail with words of hope for the new year that I want to share with you. Here it is:

FOR 2011...I sincerely wish that everything works out for you both in this new year, and that Ben's new business venture is a huge success. More importantly, Allie, my wish is that you find happiness in everything you do, that you enjoy great health above all, and that you also find that rewarding career of your own, and that you get to enjoy everything good that comes with it, not just monetary success, which can be hollow in and of itself, but the inner peace and personal joy that comes with a happy career path.

I sincerely hope you get to discover the rich and satisfying sense that what you do for work is important, rewarding, and fulfilling, no matter what that work actually is, or what the monetary benefits are.

That is my wish list for you, my darling, for 2011 and forever.

Love always,

Dad

PS: Write soon, write often. Write!


Wasn't that so nice? It made me feel really happy when I read it. My resolution for the new year is to stay happy, think positively, and keep trying to improve my situation. What are your goals for the new year? 

I'll leave you with this short video, which I found on my camera after visiting my family over the Christmas holiday. We all had a blast on Christmas Day and partied it up by dancing to the Music Choice channel on my cousin's television. I don't know who made this video, though I suspect I probably made it in a drunken haze. Enjoy!