The Gomorrah Menorah

Just last week I made a post about an item that Ben picked up from an Antique Flea Market for only seven dollars. Neither of us were sure what the intended purpose of the item was, so I asked you, my loyal readers, to take your best guess and perhaps get some recognition for your brilliance. Everyone had their own opinion as to what the item was. A lot of people insisted that the item is a lamp, even after I had written in my post that there was no hole for a cord and no place to hold the electrical wiring. It looks like it could be a lamp, but it's not. It's also not a candle holder, which a lot of people also seemed to believe. The hole at the top is too small to fit a candle (even a birthday or Hanukkah candle wouldn't fit inside), and the screw marks inside the hole indicate that the piece is missing a part that is screwed on top of the snake's head.

My dad figured it out.



It's missing a piece on top (thus the hole with screw marks), but it's a candelabra. He explains it best in the comment he left here on Friday, so let me post it here for you:

"It's the base of a candelabra.... the head of which screws into this and holds perhaps a few candle holders, perhaps also shaped as serpents. Maybe it held two candles, or four, or six... hell, maybe it held eight... a sort of Gomorrah Menorah..for the high satanic holidays"

Haha, how rad is that?! Some of you are already familiar with my dad's sense of humor and know that there is a bit of tongue-in-cheek in that comment. Ben was pretty amazed when I told him of my dad's discovery. He looked at the website where my dad found a complete example of the candelabra and was shocked at how much they were going for. The pair on the website is selling for something like $1,400. Not a bad return on something we bought for less than a ten-spot. Albeit, it's incomplete and it's not a pair, but I still think we should take it to an antique expert and find out how much it's really worth and if it was used for satanic rituals. Spooky!



Thank you to everyone for helping me figure out what this thing is! Knowledge is power!

The devil beats his wife in San Francsico

Image via Wikipedia

How do you refer to the weather when it's raining outside but the sun is also shining? I call it a sun shower, but apparently people in some parts of this country have come up with a colorful phrase for that kind of weather. They call it "when the devil beats his wife" because the devil smiles when he beats her and the sun shines, but the wife is crying and thus the rain. Thanks to Lorraine of Late to the Party for teaching me something new.

Here are three short films about sun showers in San Francisco. Watch them and enjoy, and try not to laugh too hard at my frizzy hair. When it rains I get frizz, what can I do besides put product in my hair (which I never do)? PS- I shouldn't even need to say this, but I do not endorse or condone physical violence, especially domestic violence. I just thought the reverse-euphemism was interesting.









This is kind of a cop-out post, but it's Friday and I do have other work to do. Also, San Francisco is due for some snow (what the hell?) today and tomorrow so I'll be keeping my camera handy in case I need to catch some flurries on film. Hope you all have a great weekend!

What do you think this is?

Ben bought this thing at a flea market several weeks ago because he thought it looked cool. We're not sure what the function of this thing is, but it's made of brass and is made to look like a snake is wrapping its body around the candle-stick-looking part. What do you think it is? I thought it might be a part of a lamp, but there is no hole where an electrical cord would go.



What the hell is this thing?





Detail of snake's face.




You can't really tell in this photo, but there is a screw pattern inside the hole. But what could one possibly screw into this small hole? I have no idea.


For now it's just a decorative piece and perhaps a weapon in case someone breaks in and it's close at hand. You know, it would be perfect protection in the case of a Colonel Mustard or a Professor Plum sneaking around in the dark.

If you think you know what purpose is intended for this thing, please do leave a comment!

Nose growing like Pinocchio

The truth is usually a lot more interesting than fiction. In my opinion, anyway. That's why you always hear people saying "I couldn't make this up if I tried" whenever they relay an incredible real-life experience to others.

Yesterday I posted five statements about myself and asked you to guess which statement was true and which were false. To be honest, I had some trouble coming up with four plausible lies about myself, though it seems like I did manage to trick most of you. Here's what's what:


1) Creamed corn is one of the most disgusting foods known to the grocery store.



False! I know creamed corn isn't exactly considered a delicacy, but I like it with my steak when I go to the House of Prime Rib. It's a rich food, and it's not as nasty as everyone says. It's just corn! I'll take creamed corn over creamed spinach (yuck) any day.


2) I am wayyyy too classy to drink instant coffee.



False. I'm broke as a joke and I do not snub instant coffee. Many a day instant coffee has been my saving grace in keeping me alert and ready to work.


3) Nothing makes me happier than watching a gore-filled slasher movie.



This one was a trick question. I love horror films, The Shining and Halloween being two of my favorite movies of all time, but I'm not quite a fan of gore. I really love the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre, but I can't handle all these movies that call themselves "horror" but in actuality aren't scary at all, they're just gross. I don't like being grossed out, I like being scared. If I wanna get grossed out I can find my way to a public restroom, no problem. The Shining and Halloween are two horror movies that are completely terrifying, in that they leave a lot to the imagination (there is no gore in Halloween, yet your mind allows you to believe that there is). Chew on that.


4) I have an uncle who is a minor celebrity in Indonesia.





This one is true. My Uncle Jason moved to Indonesia years ago and at one point found himself on a gameshow. The audience lovingly nicknamed him "Crazy Whitey" and he's been on television in Indonesia ever since. He's currently the host of a show called Walk the Talk.


5) All through high-school I was a varsity cheerleader.



Bless your heart if you thought this one was true. I'm the complete opposite of athletically competent, which I guess most of you already know. I did, however, consider trying out for the Pep Squad my freshman year of high-school. My friend Jing and I went to the first meeting for the squad but soon realized that it wasn't up our alley. I am not coordinated and I have trouble with choreography, so although the Pep Squad seemed fun and a whole lot cooler than cheerleading, I decided to stick with my non-sports-related after-school activities, like the Film Club and CBN, our high-school news channel.

The horse's ass and other photos

Ya big horse's ass!


I love Lichtenstein. Saw this in someone's window and took a pic.


My favorite charity and cause. Animals are the greatest-- adopt a shelter pet!!!


Joe Pesci photobombed us!! Posing with my good friend, Zenaida.


Humorous vandalism.


Wind chimes made from cutlery.


Reminded me of the cover of a Goosebumps book. Ventriloquist dummies creep me out, and this one even has a unibrow!


hahaha ewwww


It says "No Dumping!"


I've seen more than one chandelier that looks like this, but it's still pretty cool.


Smashing pumpkins and running over them with your car.


This television is lazy.


Special sock delivery!


Sookie is so cute, anything she does is adorable.


C'mon, don't tell me this little spider scared you! They eat flies and mosquitoes! I love spiders, they're my friends.


Crazy tree fungus.


An irresponsible dog owner littered their poop and someone ran over it with their car and made a big mess. Nasty, but still a photo op.

Liar-liar pants on fire

I'm a terrible liar. I don't know what happened because I used to be really, really good at making up tall tales on the fly and telling them to swarms of unwitting schoolchildren on the playground. I was a bit of a show-off in elementary school, but only as a defense mechanism. I won't get into too much detail (because I'm saving all the super juicy stories for my book when I decide to write it), but I was definitely a bullied child and was often left out of the fun games my peers played. If I wanted to get their attention I would use my vivid imagination to make up a story and get them all to listen to me. Surrounded by a crowd of attentive listeners, it was a powerful feeling.

One time, at Starr Garden playground, I had a group of kids digging in the pitcher's mound of the baseball field because of one of my tall tales. I told them that 100 years ago my grandfather had been murdered by a highwayman and his body was buried under the dirt. I had them going for almost a whole week, digging up that mound with sticks and twigs found on the ground, until one kid wised up and figured out that I had made it all up. He was pretty annoyed. I think he even called me a liar which, truth be told, hurt my feelings.

These days I prefer to stick to the truth, though I still have a knack for embellishments, just because it's easier to tell the truth than it is to try to keep track of all the mistruths. For this reason I also tend to prefer to read and write non-fiction. Anyway, on to the meaning of this post. Coyote Rose gave me an award with instructions to make up some things about myself and have you determine whether or not I'm lying. I am going to tell you four lies and one truth, and you will have to guess which are which.






1) Creamed corn is one of the most disgusting foods known to the grocery store.

2) I am wayyyy too classy to drink instant coffee.

3) Nothing makes me happier than watching a gore-filled slasher movie.

4) I have an uncle who is a minor celebrity in Indonesia.

5) All through high-school I was a varsity cheerleader.


Okay, now it's your job to decide when I'm lying and when I'm telling the truth. If you would like to partake in this meme and receive the award, it's yours! Drag the image onto your desktop and then write a post with four lies of your own and one truth. Don't forget to let me know when you post it so I can give you a human lie detector test!


You know when you see something funny on the street and you feel compelled to take a photo of it. This was one of those times.

We went to Google today...

to eat lunch and to take a tour. One of Ben's friends works there, which is how we got invited. The cafeteria is pretty impressive, and there is food just about everywhere you look on the campus. I had Indian cuisine, which wasn't amazing, but hey it was free. Check out this insane toilet that I just had to take a photo of:




And here is this British telephone booth that I wanted to pose in:

Cut-ups, dreams, and holy hailstorm!

I had a dream last night in which an older gentleman approached me and told me that I have dirty ears. He said I needed to pay more attention when I wash my ears, as they were unsightly, which made me feel simultaneously embarrassed and confused, as I take great care in making sure every body part is meticulously clean when I take a shower. Some other stuff happened in the dream that I can't remember, but I thought about the older gentleman's criticisms while washing my hair this morning. I made sure to get in every nook and cranny of my ears. I also added "q-tips" to my shopping list.

The reason why I bring up this odd and undoubtedly boring dream is because I am putting the latest issue of Be About It, my zine together and I want to make sure everyone knows about it. I am going to try to make this issue available online (in addition to the regular hard copy that I will mail out per your requests), perhaps as a PDF with the suggested Paypal donation of a dollar or two, to help with printing costs. The theme this time is dreams, and although I have plenty of submissions from my lovely readers and the deadline was last Friday, I will still be accepting late-coming works of art. I want to give you all a chance to turn in your stuff because I really think this is going to be the best issue yet!

On another note, I've been making collages like a crazy woman lately. The collages are the prizes from my little giveaway that I blogged about last month. I originally was going to make a bunch of different items as prizes, but I got on a collage-making kick and I'm having too much fun. Besides, everyone loves collages, right? And my friend Evy told me that I'm getting progressively better at the craft. Decide for yourselves.

Three collages I made for my prize winners, which I will be mailing out tomorrow:







The Valentine's Day card I made for Ben:



We've had a lot of crazy weather in San Francisco the past few days. One minute it's raining, the next it's sunny, the next it's hailing cats and dogs! Check out this little video I made yesterday morning, after being woken up by a really loud hail storm:


Sookie was very intrigued by what was making all that racket.


Sorry for the scatter-brain post, but I guess I had a lot to say and I didn't think writing three different blog posts would be appropriate. Have a lovely Thursday!

Tsaritsa's Style Notes: 02/16/2011 [and a fashion victim!]

Wanna know what I've been wearing lately? If you don't, then why did you click on this post? Just kidding. I haven't been taking too too many pictures of my outfits lately because I've been really busy with Alphyn Industries and also trying to find myself a regular day job. No luck with the latter just yet, but I have my hopes up. I think I may even resort to babysitting, if I can land myself a gig. We shall see. Enough of my tangent, here's what I wore on a day trip to the beach with Ben.



Check out my Black Widow hoodie. Pretty sweet, right? It's old lady chic, I think. It's Betsey Johnson and I got it from a thrift store for cheap! The skirt is also a recent thrift find, less than three dollars and it's Abercromie & Fitch. Seriously, the only way I'd ever wear that brand is if it's in that price range. That store is out of control with it's prices (Side note: I once got a fifty dollar gift card from a family member for A&F and the only thing I could buy was a pair of underwear and a t-shirt that was on sale. Wtf?) The t-shirt shown here is by Rope-a-Dope and was free from The Love Movement because I correctly answered a trivia question.




Close-up of t-shirt. It's a t-rex who is made to look like the rapper Nelly, and it reads: "It's gettin hot in here, global warming makes us take off all our clothes."




I wore this for brunch a while ago. I love how the skirt flows when I move, and the colors are so soft and romantic. I paired it with my suede boots which are not made for walking, by the way. I was dying to sit down after walking around for twenty minutes.






Ben and I went to a huge outdoor antique flea market a few weeks ago and it was a beautiful day, so I wore my polka dot dress that I reserve for warm and sunny days. I paired this look with a vintage rosary, my cowgirl boots, and a silver and gold cropped sweater.



I thought I would top off this edition of Style Notes with a fashion faux pas. Fashion victims: we see them every day and do nothing about them, but what can one really do? Take a photograph and blog about it in the hope that others won't make the same mistake. Check out this outfit and let me know if I'm exaggerating about how bad it is.



Well, I guess it's nice that she matched her shoes with her bag, though I'm not a fan of matchy-matchy outfits. Does anyone else have a problem with the fact that her dress is backless and she's wearing a garish black bra that cuts across her back?



I dunno, if I chose to wear this dress I'd either go braless, or if I needed the support wear one in a nude color, or even a lacey little camisole with built-in support. Anything other than a black bra would have been acceptable with this look. Then again, I'm not sure if I'd ever wear a dress like that with nothing underneath, unless I was at the beach and wearing the dress as a coverup. She could have paired it with jean shorts and kept the black bra because it would then be an "edgy" look, but right now she gets a fail from me for wearing this out in public. Sorry, but I had a camera! Let this be a lesson to all fashion victims! [Note: The identities of all fashion victims have been left out to protect the innocent.]

What do you think of my looks? Do you think I was unfair to today's fashion victim?

Just another day in February...

I've never been a big fan of Valentine's Day. Even when I'm in a relationship, I don't see what all the hype is about. Yeah, I love chocolates but I love them even more when they're discounted on February 15th. The commercial holidays-- the holidays that require you to buy shit-- just really don't appeal to me. They never have. I used to make my own homemade Valentine's Day cards when I was a kid. I would cut out squares of paper and draw something cute on them, like maybe a purple beetle with a thought bubble that read "Will you be my love bug?" I'm pretty sure my dad still has one of those saved on his bulletin board from years ago.

This year, I plan on making a little card for Ben and cooking him a delicious meal. What I will make has yet to be decided, but it will be delicious I'm sure. Maybe some fancy ravioli, or a slow-cooked stew... Mmm, just thinking about the possibilities is making my mouth water. Ben left for work extra early this morning, but woke me up to give me a present. I wasn't expecting anything, and I told him I didn't deserve a gift. I haven't opened it yet, but I did sneak a peek at the card inside which made my heart melt and my eyes tear up. I'm so fortunate that I found Ben and trusted my instincts.

Anyway, I just wanted to say I hope you all had a lovely weekend and don't let this silly holiday get you down. If you're in the Bay Area and looking for plans tonight, check out this free champagne tasting party! I might have to stop by, you know how I feel about champeezy!



Who can resist free champagne?



Sookie is helping me with my work.



Actually, Sookie wrote this whole blog post by herself! What a smart kitty!



I can't wait to find out what's in this little pink bag!




What do you have planned for today? How do you feel about commercial holidays?

Express Yourself... errr, Born This Way

Image by Getty Images via @daylife

So Lady Gaga's new single, "Born this way," hit the webz recently and I decided to listen to it this morning. Check it out for yourself.





I was pretty disappointed. It's extremely derivative of Madonna and actually sounds like a carbon copy of "Express Yourself." Like I told Nips, it's no "Just Dance," nor is it a "Poker Face." Please do something original and fun, Lady GagGag.

What do you think?